John

johnneh @ 2006-09-15T22:56:00

2006-09-16T02:58:00Z

Just thought I'd do a little thing here to as to what I've been up to!

We're currently at work on the follow up to 'Chris & John's ROAD TRIP!', which is gonna be called 'Chris & John to the Rescue!'. We're nearing done filming, only a few days left from now until mid-October, and we premiere on OUTtv October 8th (aaaah!! scary!).

I'm also a field producer/production coordinator for a new Life Network series here in Canada called Three Takes. I started this right after I finished season 2 of The Mom Show.

And then I have a bunch of other project brewing on the sides ;) Hoping to have a month off in January to sleep, watch TV, and hopefully go on a tropical vacation of sorts! Then I'll be back at it. I'm thinking of producing a low-budget horror feature film in the spring, but I'm deciding if that's gonna be too much work or not. I guess it'll all depend on my work situation, if I'll have the time/money for that.

But everything's going well! Justin, Hershey and I all still live in the same apartment in Toronto. Justin's store is doing very well, and is pretty much just as busy as I am, so it all works out.

VERY excited about the premieres of Ugly Betty, Jericho, The Nine and Six Degress. VERY upset Will & Janelle weren't the final two of Big Brother! *sigh*

That's about it for now!! :D

New Photos!

2006-09-16T01:45:04Z

Hey y'all! Long time no post! Well, I think most of you guys hang over at My Space now, but for those who don't, here's a little preview of some of my new photos (and new look) for the new season of my show:

Head on over to www.myspace.com/johnneh101 for more! If you're already on My Space, add me as a friend!

My Space

2006-06-06T02:10:10Z

Just letting y'all know that I now officially have a "space"! http://www.myspace.com/johnneh101

FYI...

2006-06-04T17:55:47Z

For those Canadians out there, just got word that Falcon Beach will re-air it's entire first season on GLOBAL, beginning this Tuesday! Again, give it a couple of episodes before making judgement..

Hello!

2006-06-03T18:41:25Z

Hey y'all!

Long time no post!

So what have I been up to...in February I started back at The Mom Show, this time as Production Coordinator and more recently have been doing some Field Producing, which is very cool.

Other than that, I've also been busy as of late helping Justin out at his store. I'm here at the moment actually. He's having a "Pet-Palooza" on June 17th, which is a fundraiser for two local pet shelters, so busy helping him organize that.

Hopefully going to be going into production on season two of Chris & John's Road Trip this August. We've pretty much got the season planned out, but now it's just getting all of the financial aspects of it together, which is not the fun part. But if that does fall through, I actually just accepted another job I was offered for when The Mom Show ends - it would be working on another Life network series - it's most likely gonna be called "Three Takes", kinda like The View but with three woman - one single, one married, and one divorced. If I do end up going with that, and not Road Trip, I'll be Production Coordinator and Field Producer, and I'll get a nice pay bump, which is enjoyable. I would be there right until December 21st or something like that.

But I am very excited for this summer...I love summer, as you all know, so I'm highly anticipating many trips to the drive in (tonight may be one if we don't decide to just get more work done at the store) and hopefully getting up north. We're going to a resort up north for a weekend in July, that Justin won tickets to on the radio. It's all-inclusive and looks amazing - www.delawana.com

Um what else...I went to NYC in April! Was lots of fun, but was kept busy. I was there representing OUTtv at a Queer Media convention. Met lots of cool folks, partied lots.

Rent came to Toronto for like a week, and went and saw it. It was pretty good, although not as good as the film (although I hear most people who see the play first, then the movie, say the opposite). I felt I just didn't get nearly as connected to the characters, which is I guess just a nature of the different formats. But also I just didn't feel most of the performances were up to par. I really wish I could have seen the original cast. I hope I get to see the actual NYC production someday.

As far as TV is concerned...was way too addicted to LOST and American Idol. Still catching up on Prison Break, Invasion and Veronica Mars. VEEEEEEERY depressed about Everwood. Can't wait for Monday's 2-hr Finale. Justin and I recently started watching it again, when it had it's spring premiere, and are completely obsessed. I wish I didn't stop watching it for that period...hopefully some Canadian station will pick it up in syndication like ABC Family did, as they aren't planning on releasing it on DVD after the first season didn't do well.

Oh! For those of you in the US, a Canadian series called Falcon Beach is premiering on ABC Family this Sunday. It's GREAT. Okay, at first you'll think it's pretty bad...but then it slowly improves and gets SO ADDICTIVE. The show aired this winter here in Canada. The show is VERY YOUNG AMERICANS, except the actors aren't nearly up to the cast of YA. But still, YOUNG AMERICANS FANS, definitely check it out! I'm in love with Peter Mooney. (I actually discovered him first and wanted to make him a TV star! he's the friend of someone who was in my short film Surfacing. loves him.) You have to stick around though 'til like the 3rd episode though to see him, as he wasn't in the original 2-hr pilot that's on this Sunday. www.falconbeach.ca

Now I'm watching Canadian Idol, and looking forward to Big Brother 7 All Stars!!

Very much looking forward to Superman Returns and The Lake House. Hopefully they will both be good - I always seem to be disappointed in movies lately.

OH! But I went to the Toronto Gay & Lesbian film fest this year and saw three GREAT films:

The first is Another Gay Movie which is a spoof of American Pie (it's 4 gay guys trying to loose their virginity by the end of summer - and instead of Apple Pie, it's quiche!). VERY funny and VERY hot. Lots of sex & skin. But again, VERY funny and a great film overall. Some great appearances by Scott Thompson, Graham Norton and naked Richard Hatch! - www.anothergaymovie.com

The second is a documentary called Camp Out. It's about a group of teenagers who all have recently come out, and are dealing with being both gay & christian. So this organization have created a camp for gay teen christians...it's a really good doc - the kids are such great characters, and it's actually a really funny film, with some touching moments. www.campoutmovie.com

The third is a low-budget film called Fat Girls - which was really funny, although after seeing the first two films I told you about, it's not as good as I originally thought. The production values just aren't really there, but it is still a really good film that I recommend. Great cast - including that dorky kid from the movie-musical Camp (one of my faves!)

So that's about it! As always, I will try and update this much more often!! Keep in touch, peeps.

Merry Chrismukkah & Me!

2005-12-25T06:47:02Z

Hey everyone!

Hope everyone is enjoying the holiday break. And with that, it means that I actually have time to update this damn thing, besides a random post about a movie or something.

So, as I noted in my last real post - we finished shooting on the show in mid-september. Immediately from there I began working in the production office of the Candian "Life Network" talk show called "The Mom Show" (http://www.lifenetwork.ca/themomshow). So, I did that by day, and I did post production on my show by night, weekends and any moment of time I had left!! It was even more so intense that the summer of shooting...words cannot explain my lack of sleep.

But, somehow I got through it. It was a great bunch of people I worked with on the Mom Show, but I just couldn't enjoy it because of everything else going on. I was just walking through the motions (to quote a line from the Buffy musical). But that finished December 2nd, and then post production on my show finished I think December 15th.

So, since then, I've done some resting, some catching up on TV, and more work. lol. While I am now officially unemployed, which means I'm eternally broke, it's a much needed rest. I have a lot of wrap stuff still left to do with my show, in terms of doing some final touches to some things I'm not entirely happy with, making copies of the show to send out to crew & sponsors, and doing a lot of budget stuff that I never got around to doing earlier because of how swamped I was.

Plus, there's my short film Surfacing, which I'm getting back out on the festival circuit. We're going to be in a festival in Kingston, Ontario in February (http://www.reelout.com/festivals/2006festival/pr_06_feb04.html#hung ) and I just sent the film out this week to three other international festivals for submission, so we'll so how that goes! And I have about 10 more festivals I plan on submitting the film to over the next 2-3 months. Will keep you all udpated, especially those in the US and elsewhere if we get a screening near you!!

So...as of right now, my life, in terms of career, is sort of in limbo. I have no idea what the next while has in store for me. For now, I'm unemployed and I'm going to take this to my advantage right now to the best that I can, to wrap up the show, get Surfacing out, and watch lots of TV. lol.

Oh, and big news with Justin! He is now officially the owner of the Cobourg, Ontario "Global Pet Foods" franchise store! (http://www.globalpetfoods.ca) So, needless to say, he's been quite the busy boy with that!

And I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting...but I can't get to it all in ONE post! ;)

So, hope everyone's well! Check out our site, http://www.chrisandjohnonline.com if you haven't already, or go check the updated episode descriptions with photos. Hopefully soon we'll be adding a drinking game to the site! hehe. that will be so much fun to play. And while I'm still a relatively non-busy guy, I'll try and keep this updated more often ;)

johnneh @ 2005-12-22T11:48:00

2005-12-22T16:50:10Z

Saw Brokeback Mountain on the weekend! Great film! Cannot wait to see it again. I think it's sort of a must with the film, that you have to see it more than once. I feel like there's so much more I want to see in the film, that I didn't get to see the first time, because I was just sort of taking it all in. And I am now officially in love with Heath. And FINALLY people can realize what a talent Michelle Williams is. It's funny, she's done just as great, if not even better, over and over again on Dawson's, and only now is she getting the recognition that she deserves.

No Day But Today...

2005-11-26T07:18:32Z

I just saw the movie Rent. I have never seen the play, or anything to do with Rent before in my life. I am so deeply touched by that movie. It has moved me emotionally, it has inspired me, and I am so very proud for that film to have been made, and to be playing to such a wide audience. The theatre tonight was packed. I know that's not going to necessarily translate into large box office numbers, as I live in a very metropolitan area and I am sure different communities will respond to it differently. While the movie obviously had it's flaws, I highly recommend everyone go see it. These are the types of films that I want to be a part of, and one of the reasons I am in the industry that I am in (even for all of the flaws that the industry itself has).

johnneh @ 2005-11-16T13:14:00

2005-11-16T18:14:16Z

My DVR didn't record LOST last Wednesday night!! Anyone have any idea how I could go about downloading the episode? I'm completely clueless when it comes to that.

johnneh @ 2005-10-23T13:12:00

2005-10-23T17:15:36Z

In case you guys haven't noticed yet, www.chrisandjohnonline.com is now fully up and running! Be sure to check out the 2-minute preview on the Multimedia page!

johnneh @ 2005-10-13T15:23:00

2005-10-13T19:26:40Z

This Year's Love...

2005-10-02T16:35:15Z

Hey Y'all! Just a quick note to say how excited I am because tonight I'm going to see David Gray in concert!!! I've been dying to see him ever since that infamous summer of 2000...*sigh*

I...Love...VERONICA MARS!

2005-09-06T00:17:34Z

So, production wrapped last weekend on principal photography on my show! Now we only have one more officially day of shooting, next Wednesday September 14th for our "welcome home" party. Very excited!

Since I now have some down time, I spent the day today catching up on my fav new show, Veronica Mars! Wooo! I am so addicted and can't wait until this week's second-to-last episode of the season, then the season finale, then the season two premiere!! That's so exciting for me.

The OUTtv Fall Preview special, which Chris & I host, is premiering this Wedneday night, so I should have a 2-minute preview of the show available at some point soon! Excited for people to finally get to see some of what I've been slaving over all summer!

Oh, and loves Prison Break! Excited for The OC and Reunion next week..

johnneh @ 2005-07-23T21:49:00

2005-07-24T02:04:15Z

Hey everyone!

So, lately things have been crazy busy, as always, but on Thursday I did a day of shooting B-Roll and interviews for our first episode, and near the end of the day I could feel that I wasn't feeling well, and by the time Justin and I were in the car on the way home I was full out sick, with a swelling sore throat and shivering...I don't know what it was, if I got heat stroke (I was sitting on the beach for most of the day doing interviews), or if it was the water (I went swimming in Lake Erie...) or if it was just everything suddenly catching up on me...so, in short, it has forced me to slow down, and I spent all of yesterday and most of today just resting...sleeping...watching TV and doing pretty much nothing. While that's not such a good thing as I'll only have more work to do later, I have definitely needed this.

It's been so hard to have a life this summer, because I know that I can make time to just "hang out" and take time off, but I can't enjoy it when I do because I have anxiety about the work I COULD and SHOULD be doing. I'm just really excited to get the production side of the show over with, so I can concentrate on post-production, but we still have two full more episodes to shoot, as well as some pick-up days on the rest of the episodes. And what I thought was going to be easy for the last two episodes, has become a huge nightmare...I have three proposals out there for the filming of the two episodes, but I am not hearing back from any of the three sources...I'm going to give them all a call Monday morning, and if two of them don't go through I have NO idea what I will do...I am so out of options. I was really banking on two of these places...this has been a major cause of anxiety lately, especially because there's so much I CAN'T do until I find out from these places!

But having this time off has also given me a lot of time to think...it's SOOOO weird to be NOT coming back to school this September...the first time in like 17 years!! It's going to be weird. And I know that I'm working on my production through the month of August...but after that, I have NO idea what things will lead me to. I'm not even sure what I want to do.

Things have been going well with Justin...he's working towards opening up his own pet food store, which seems like it will probably be happening next spring, and of which will most definitely not be in or around the city of Toronto...our lease here at our apartment will be up come December 1st, but we'll probably renew it for another year. I personally cannot imagine living anywhere right now besides right here in downtown, it would just be too difficult otherwise, especially because most likely I won't have my own car come September.

Justin's at his aunt's house right now, spending the night there - meaning I have the night here to myself, the first time in a while! Which is kinda nice, as it's given me this chance to just have a bath, watch Big Brother (how hot is James?!), and do stuff like this post!

Anyways, tomorrow is going to be another fairly relaxing day for me of just getting better, cleaning, organizing, some production budgetary stuff, maybe rent a video...but then come Monday it's back into full swing for the rest of production!

johnneh @ 2005-07-07T00:41:00

2005-07-07T04:50:59Z

Hey y'all! Currently sitting here with Jess (Slicey) and Oz! They're on a road trip, and have stopped in here in Toronto for a few days!!

We're heading off to Toronto Island in the morning, and then not really sure what else we're going to do! They're also going to join us on our shoot this weekend in London, Ontario for Chris & John's ROAD TRIP!

Also of note to EVY, Jess and Oz send a special "thanks!" for all of the cards (especially the ones with glitter!) that you send out! ;)

Hope everyone's enjoying the summer!

Logo

2005-07-04T17:46:13Z

Hey guys! Just to let my US friends know: If you've been watching the new network LOGO looking for My Fabulous Gay Wedding - the US broadcasting name has actually been changed to "First Comes Love", and it airs tonight (Monday) at 10pm I believe (tonight's episode in the US is not one that I worked on, but it's a pretty good one with the woman getting married). You can find more on the show on LOGO on this website: http://www.logoonline.com/shows/dyn/first_comes_love/series.jhtml

Also for those on Canada, be sure to watch the season finale of My Fabulous Gay Wedding this Wednesday at 10pm! I worked intensely on this episode, and I'm positive it's going to be amazing! The boys getting married are just two cute!!

johnneh @ 2005-06-24T01:24:00

2005-06-24T05:25:04Z

Hello, people!

So, I have been terrible with keeping out the whole "weekly" aspect of my summer updates...but beginning next week I'm going to get back on track!

Things have been insane, as we started production on my new television series, which was actually just announced today by OutTV!:

AIRING IN SEPTEMBER: Chris & John's ROAD TRIP!

Over the past 8 months, PrideVision and OUTtv viewers have got to know and love John Simpson and Chris Carter through The Chris & John Show - a 5-minute interstitial series.

This summer, we're going to follow the crazy antics of Chris and John on a new, 30-minute reality/comedy series, "Chris and John's ROAD TRIP!" Over the course of 6 episodes, the series will follow Chris and John as they go on a summer vacation road trip across Ontario, and beyond!

The series is currently in Production, with stops scheduled for the Erie, PA Pride Picnic on Saturday June 25th, Toronto Pride on Sunday June 26th, Toronto Trek Convention on Saturday July 16th, and Folsom Fair North on Sunday June 17th.

If you would like to appear on the show, or if you would like Chris & John to make a stop at your event, or have an idea, email us at john.simpson@pridevisiontvcom

"Chris & John's ROAD TRIP!" is a new 6-episode series from John Simpson Productions that is being filmed this summer, set for a fall launch date on the Canadian national network OUTtv. Each episode chronicles the crazy antics of culture aficionados Chris & John as they travel from city to city on a summer-long road trip adventure. John Simpson and Chris Carter star. John Simpson serves as Executive Producer.

We started production last Friday, and filmed Fri, Sat and Sunday. We start back up in production this Saturday when we're travelling to Pennsylvania, then returning that night for Toronto's Pride Parade...after which I'm sure I will drop down dead! lol

Hope all is well, and Happy Pride Month everyone!

That's Faaaaaabulous!

2005-06-02T05:42:15Z

So My Fabulous Gay Wedding premiered tonight! I am SO proud to have been a part of the show. It turned out so well, and everyone in involved worked so hard at it. I'm so excited to see the two episodes that I worked full time on.

And did y'all see my little cameo?! "I've never been this cold in my life!" - which I hadn't! It was AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL freezing that day! Did you see the frost on the windows?! Now imagine carrying large metal platforms and chairs and crates of glasses, etc, with no gloves on!!

I'm not entirely pleased with the credits, which I knew I wouldn't be with the terrible, nasty, director we had. But I hope that you all paid VEEEEEEEERY close attention to the shots of the two grooms and two brides on the cake - you have no idea what I went through to get those!!

Anyways, it's late, still got work to do, then work at 9:00am!

G'night!

Weekly Summer Update Report - Vol. #2, Issue #2

2005-06-01T02:37:45Z

What to Watch:

MY FABULOUS GAY WEDDING!! It premieres tomorrow (Wedneday) night at 10pm on GLOBAL in Canada! I'm not sure what's going on with the launch with LOGO in the US (Maybe one of my friendly US friends can fill me in?), but it'll be on here beginning tomorrow!

I'm very excited about it. I actually ran into the series director and co-creator today. I've only read two reviews so far - one good, and one not so good. I have another one here to read still. The episode airing tomorrow as the premiere is actually the 4th episode shot, which is the first one that I worked on. The only part of the episode that I worked on was on the actual wedding day (the most important part!), but I saw a rough cut of the episode and it rocks! Rob and Greg, the guys getting married...are interesting characters, that's for sure!

Last Week:

So, shortly after my last post, I came down with this nasty cold...which I had for all of Sunday, while in Stoney Creek at my niece's birthday. Then I was feeling quite a bit better by the Monday, when we went to Minden. The weather was pretty crappy, but we had a good time regardless, and Hershey got in the river quite a few times!

Then I began my new job on the Tuesday! I really like it there - lots of nice people, relaxed atmosphere...the complete opposite of Land of the Dead (which also comes out at some point in June, too!)

Since Tuesday, I've been doing a mixture of a lot of working for my 9am-9pm job, as well as TONS of pre-production on the Road Trip show, I did coverage of the Inside Out Closing Party for OUTtv, as well as pre-production for an episode of "The Chris & John Show" that we're filming this weekend at Fashion Cares (www.fashioncares.com), hosted by Pamela Anderson, with performer Jann Arden! We're doing the "red carpet" interviews, so that'll be fun! We also have a clothing sponsor for the episode, so Saturday morning we get to go try on clothes and pick out whatever we want...so that'll be fun too! Loves it.

This Week:

Well, I've got work all week this week, pre-production on both of the shows I'm doing, and then on the weekend on Saturday we've got filming, then Sunday I've got to drive Chris back to Stoney Creek, drop by my parent's house, then head up to a campground to scout out, and meet the owners, etc, where we're going to be filming later in the month!

Have a great week, y'all!

Doggie!!

2005-05-05T23:57:31Z

Hey everyone!

Just updated to say that I'm well...busy, but well. Finishing up on Land of the Dead this week...have next week off, which is looovely! But will still be busy.

Anyways, the biggest news of all: I got a doggie!!! Yes, that's right, Justin and I are the proud parents of a 3-year-old chocolate lab that needed a good home!

Here's our boy:

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Isn't he just the cutest thing ever?! He's so amazing...and we love him to death.

Um...so yeah! That's it! And go see House of Wax this weekend! Soooooo excited!

...Back to your regularily scheduled programming, y'all!!

Oh well.

2005-04-30T15:21:02Z

Ya win some, ya lose some!

Woo-hoo!!!

2005-04-16T22:17:06Z

Hellooooooooo, everyone!

So, wow, how some things can change over such a short period of time!

So, I am now an offical college graduate! Last night we had the screenings of all of the films, and thus it was the world premiere for my film "Surfacing"! It was one of the most terrifying and overwhelming experiences!!

But the response was SO amazing, and blew me away. It was completely overwhelming. I knew we had a good film, but I wasn't expecting the response that we got from the teachers, other students, and guests at the screening. I'm beyond thrilled! And I can't wait for the festival screening.

It's so weird to have put so many months and months and months into a film and for it to finally be finished and have actually been viewed on the big screen by an audience! It's the most rewarding experience.

And so in other news, yesterday was my last day at This is Daniel Cook, as starting on Monday, I'll be leaving that show to start working on the reshoots for the film "Land of the Dead", which is beyond cool!

THEN, in like four weeks I'll be moving on to start a 6-month gig on a new film called "Solace", starring Bruce Willis and Hilary Swank, to be directed by Shekhar Kapur (Elizabeth, The Four Feathers). Here's a description to the film that I found on comingsoon.net:

"The movie centers on a doctor with psychic abilities (Willis) who is enlisted by the police to help track down a serial killer who turns out to have psychic abilities as well."

So while I'm not exactly the Bruce Willis film type, this should be exciting! A LOT of work, but it'll be cool to be working on such a huge film!

So, despite all of this work, things should actually start to get a little more relaxing, for at least the next little bit. Gotta start getting Surfacing submitted into festivals world-wide.

Hope all is well with y'all!

Haaaaappy Holiday!

2004-12-25T17:52:22Z

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to everyone out there! Hope that you're enjoying the day, and I hope to be able to talk to you all much more in the new year!

I've had a great Christmas so far - it's been kind of hectic, but perhaps I'll get a couple of days here to slow down. When I'm done here, I'm off to get ready to go up to Minden (3hrs North) to go to Justin's family's for Christmas dinner, then I'll be back tomorrow. I wanted to make the phone call rounds today before I left, but it doesn't look like that's gonna happen, so this will have to suffice for now!

Take care, y'all!

Love,

Johnneh

johnneh @ 2004-11-27T13:41:00

2004-11-27T18:48:16Z


young americans are love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

How bizarre that they would get Young Americans there! How would they have picked Young Americans out of my journal? And of all things! The only two it would come up with was "Youn Americans are love" and "John is love"...lol

To "Throw Caution to the Wind"... or not to "Throw Caution to the Wind"...

2004-11-04T06:35:19Z

Where is the line between "throwing caution to the wind", and being unrealistic? In life we're constantly being forced to make choices, and is it always worth it to take the risk?

I won't forget that quote from Mary Alice on Desperate Housewives, how to live in the world in fear is to not live at all. I feel like I'm constantly fighting my fear of the world. No matter what anyone says, or how anyone acts...the world is scary. Very scary. Over the past few years, especially the past year, I've faced a lot of my fearfulness....it's not even so much as overcoming the fear, but getting over it. I'm still going to be scared of every decision I make. I'm always going to be terrified walking alone on the streets of Toronto in the dark. As much as I force myself to do things and generally do them well and ignore the scariness of it all, it's still going to be there.

I've lived my life up until not so long ago in almost an entirely different world. I denied everything that was around me, and lived in the magical fake world of television, fantasy and my parent's home. And coming out of that world, facing things, facing reality has I suppose been easier than I thought.

Balancing life has also been perhaps the most difficult thing as of late. Working towards my future, in career and life, and balancing that with my present and past.

A lot of times I feel like I'm the only person in the world going through stuff like this, and then every once and a while I'll see someone in the halls of my school, or walking down the street and really think about it. They have so much going on in their life too. Everyone is always going through something. And while I feel right now that I'm working so hard to get to a certain undefined point in my life where suddenly everything will stop and be perfect, everything that I've been working towards. But what I've recently realized is that will never happen. My life will constantly be hectic because I'll never be happy to settle for anything less than perfect. I keep imagining being able to just spend time with friends, be able to sit down again and watch a TV show every week during it's regular time spot and not on a tape days, weeks, months or even years later!

So I'm going to have to keep working on this balancing thing. There SO much that I want to do, and I feel like there's so little time. And I know that the most common advise is to cut something out of my schedule, but there's absolutely nothing I can sacrifice from here on out. I've already cut out more than I should have, and I'd like to take a lot of that back and add so much more to it.

I'm really excited about what lies ahead of me, with school ending in December and my placement beginning in January. But again, there's the scared thing. Although I suppose this is a very to-be-expected kind of scared, finishing school and living the "real" life. I'm scared of if I'm making the right decisions, I'm scared about making enough money. What if I mess everything up? Everything that I'm doing in my life right now is SO crucial to my future, and there's really is no room at all for error.

I know that I did a lot of babbling in this post and a LOT of it probably didn't make any sense at all, so congratulations if you made it this far! If you'd like, go ahead and reply to this post. Do any of you relate to any of the above? Like such a common misconception that I've had is that once you're a "real" adult, with a family and a job...all of these problems that I'm having just magically go away, and it's only recently that I figured this out. How do you all make the decisions in your life, as far as balancing and making everything work? Did you live in fear? Do you live in fear? Do you still live in fear, but face it?